Written by Julia Yurchesyn

Thumbnail & Header Photo by Muhammad Haikal Sjukri on Unsplash

If you use TikTok, you’ve probably heard Ashley Ward’s audio urging you to “romanticize your life” and view yourself as the “main character.” In a New York Times article, Christina Caron notes how this trend found attention during Covid-19 and “offers a sense of agency, a feeling of control that has been sorely lacking as the pandemic grinds on.” How does this notion of “romanticizing your life” affect those enrolled in post-secondary education? Can the romanticization of learning be beneficial?

Being a student is challenging and stressful at times. It involves juggling classes, a personal life, and often a job. It makes sense then that romanticizing your life is a viable way to simply make life more enjoyable, whether with a trip to a local cafe or by purchasing new stationery. The rise of studytubers (particularly within the UK) is demonstrative of the philosophy “romanticize your life,” as they often construct a narrative out of their life through their content. Some types of videos may include ‘study with me’ or ‘week in my life', which usually involve aesthetically pleasing shots that present an idealistic image of a person’s life. But this is a curated selection of moments throughout the day, many of them even constructed with the intention to share it online. It’s becoming more widely known that social media is not the place to see honest and authentic representations of people’s lives, but it’s still popular because the fairytale narrative influencers construct is appealing. This is what spurs content consumption, even if someone is aware that an influencer’s representation of their life is, to an extent, artificial. So what does this mean for study influencers specifically, and for university students who enjoy this trend?

On a positive note, this kind of content and romanticization can help students find joy even when university life is difficult, and this is something that Christina Caron mentions in her article: “What truly brings us happiness? Is it that expensive vacation or that new piece of clothing? Or should we stop waiting for that picture-perfect moment and start enjoying the present?” (NYT). Being able to appreciate the beauty of a winter morning while on your way to write a midterm, or lighting a scented candle at your desk as you work on your essay makes some of the harder parts of student-life a little easier. It can also help motivate us to continue studying—when you see other students living their best academic lives, it makes you want to do the same.

But can romanticizing your life have some negative effects? Is it possible to always idealize your reality, and should we try to? At least when it comes to content consumption, romanticization can create skewed expectations for our lives. When we fail to find satisfaction in our day-to-day lives, even after appreciating the beauty in the little things, what will we do? And how much does romanticizing your life rely on appreciating what is already in your life versus constructing an aesthetic within it?

I think for me, personally, the trouble comes when I’m unable to measure up to the romantic idealization I see on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, etc. Getting all the cute study supplies, using an iPad for note-taking, getting fancy coffee drinks for a long study session—all of that is so expensive and links romanticization to consumerism. If I don’t have all the popular supplies that I see student-influencers using, will I really feel like I’m able to romanticize my life? Or will I feel like my life is not measuring up?

And if I don’t have the ability to study the way I usually do, or if I’m not getting the grades I would have wanted, or if my life just feels too messy to romanticize, how happy will I feel if I’ve been putting all my effort into being the main character with the beautiful life?

I don’t mean to say that I’m anti-romanticization. But I have discovered that I think it is at its best when we aren’t comparing our lives to others. Let’s romanticize for ourselves without wondering if it’s ‘romantic enough’, without constantly looking for the next product to buy or trying to live up to the internet’s standards of being the “main character.” Having a confident and healthy self-esteem enables us to appreciate what we have, and avoid feeling like we don’t measure up.

And finally, I want to have passion for the life I’m living. If all my enjoyment comes from romanticizing external elements of life and not from the work I’m doing, then I don’t think it’s possible for me to feel satisfied. As a student, I want to feel passionate about learning more about my subject. If your reason for doing something is aligned with your passion, then it’s easier to carry on with your work when it’s difficult. So, it’s important to ask yourself why you’re doing something—does it bring you satisfaction?

Should university students romanticize their life? If they want to, I think it’s a cool idea! It can help us enjoy life more and slow down to appreciate the smaller blessings in life. But why stop there? Maybe having an even more romantic notion—living a life you are passionate about—will take us a little closer towards fulfillment. A self-sufficient mindset helps us build a life where we don’t depend on others for affirmation. Rather, we’re confident in our own path, spurred on by inner motivation. So, give yourself permission to feel joy.

Romanticizing Your Life: Helpful or Harmful for University Students?

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