Passing: It’s More Complicated Than You Might Think
Written by Joyo Smit
Thumbnail and Header Photo by Tim Mossholder
Passing is a term used to describe when a trans or nonbinary person looks like what they identify as. Whether or not a trans person passes can significantly impact how they navigate the world. For example, if a passing transgender woman uses a women’s public bathroom, she would be less likely to be harassed or confronted than a transgender woman who does not pass. How a trans person is perceived is important for them to consider when thinking about their safety.
Passing privilege refers to how a trans person tends to be treated better because they pass. People may find it easier to refer to them by their desired name and pronouns, and they may even not be clocked as transgender, making them less susceptible to transphobic discrimination and attacks.
For some trans people, their goal in transitioning is to pass. They may do this for a variety of reasons, such as safety concerns, transphobia, or gender dysphoria. They might physically transition, train their voice to sound differently, and dress in a way that aligns with their gender identity. Others do not focus on passing, simply wanting to appear as their true selves regardless of how they are perceived. Others are somewhere in the middle, choosing to pass in some ways but not the rest.
For myself as a transmasculine individual, I have a complicated relationship with passing. Eventually, I would like to pass as a man with regard to my physical features. However, I feel that masculine gender roles are too limiting to the person I want to be and how I like to present myself. Many things I enjoy are seen as “feminine”, like wearing makeup or being interested in fashion. Additionally, I do not want to fall victim to the beliefs of toxic masculinity during my transition. For example, while manspreading when I sit down could potentially make me pass more, it is not worth it to make the women around me uncomfortable, and as someone who has lived as a girl before, I know what it is likely for men to make themselves large in order to make you feel small. Ultimately, I search for a form of masculinity that suits me and does not harm those around me, but rather uplifts them and encourages them to also be their true selves.
Passing is also not as simple as “passing” or “not passing”. Everyone has different perspectives and perceptions about what it means to pass. Gender is a social construct that people will identify differently - some may associate long hair with womanhood while others associate it more with dresses and the colour pink. Some may identify masculinity with large muscles, while others identify it with being tall.
Intersectionality can affect whether or not a person passes. So far, I have spoken about passing as “male” or “female”. However, in scientific terms, sex is a lot less binary than that. People may differ physically, having some male characteristics and other female ones. This is called being intersex, and only affects a person’s biology, not how they identify with regards to gender. Intersex people may not pass in the same way non-intersex people do, even if they are raised as and identify with one binary gender. To learn more about the complex biology of gender, I highly recommend this video by Forest Valkai.
Gender presents differently among varying cultures. However, with European colonization, Euro-centric gender roles are upheld as the norm. As a result, those that do not fit into the strict European gender norms may not be seen as passing as their true gender. For example, women of colour are sometimes seen as less feminine than their white counterparts. Button noses are often seen as feminine and ideal, but women of colour might tend to have more hooked or flat noses. These beauty standards have roots in racism, where women of colour are not identified as real women.
There are even times when cisgender people don't pass as their gender. If their features don’t match perceptions of their gender, people may suspect that they are transgender. This is called transvestigating: investigating and analyzing a person’s features to determine what their assigned gender at birth is. This was apparent in the 2024 Olympics during the competition of women’s boxer Imane Khalif. After her opponent gave up after 46 seconds into the match, online discourse began, suspecting that she was actually a transgender woman. Celebrities like Elon Musk and J. K. Rowling fueled this in online discourse, expressing grievances about “men” in women’s sports. Imane Khalif, however, is a cisgender woman competing in women’s sports. Granted, her testosterone levels are slightly elevated from other women, but these kinds of biological advantages are not new in sports. Khalif has filed a cyberbullying lawsuit naming some of these celebrities.
There are, however, things you can do to stop this kind of mistreatment. Using someone’s correct pronouns and name goes a long way, no matter if they are cisgender or not. Understand that expectations of gender are largely unachievable for the majority of people. Above all, keep learning and listening to those around you.
Transphobia affects everyone, putting unrealistic standardized gender norms that many cisgender people cannot achieve. Gender is, ultimately, a social construct that many individuals do not fit perfectly into, trans or not. Whether you’re a trans person choosing not to physically transition, or a cisgender woman with elevated testosterone levels, there are very real dangers that emerge when you contradict someone’s socialized perception of what gender should look like. We can make the world a safer place by respecting one another’s identities and embracing each other’s true selves, regardless of appearances.