Who Let the (Therapy) Dogs Out?

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Dogs are totally the best; fluffy or not, large and bearlike, or cute and cuddly – canines win all of our hearts and melt them into a puddle of sunshine and rainbows. They could brighten up most dull days for anyone and are the centre of limelight for a room full of dog-lovers. The same applies for therapy dogs at SMU, they seem like the sweetest little fellas just bubbling around in their leashes, dragging cuddles out of everyone. Sounds like the cutest little story, right? Not necessarily, because the dog therapy situation has started to get out of control. It’s as though if anything happens at all, people think that therapy dogs and hot chocolate are the solution. Failing school? Therapy dogs. Personal problems? Therapy dogs. Going broke? Therapy dogs. It was cool when it started off as a one-time thing, but now it’s getting way too extra. They just seem to be lurking in every building on campus, just being cute and lame at the same time. Or maybe they are all collaboratively plotting to infiltrate humans and just make us dependent, sad souls. Honestly, they are probably judging us big time for failing our courses and partying too much. I mean just gaze into their eyes for a second. Do you not see all that judgement lurking in there? What if they’re just trying to get into our feels and emotions to keep us from realizing their plot to take over? You never know exactly what is going on in their podgy heads.

Credit to Ning Draws Things: https://ningdrawsthings.com/tag/dogs/

Credit to Ning Draws Things: https://ningdrawsthings.com/tag/dogs/

Yes, some of these arguments may have arisen from my inferiority-complex issues, which could also be warping my viewpoint right now. That being said, I once was a huge dog lover until this whole “therapy” farce started. Having them around once in a while is great to say the least, but having them around all the time is starting to feel like that nauseating feeling of munching on deep-fried Twinkies, all the time. Not certain of why they are coming around so often, but I doubt if we’d ever know. I refuse to believe that they are here just for cuddles. Looks as though they are taking over the world soon and SMU even sooner.

A friend once said, “dogs are the Millennials of the 21st century” – soon enough you may see them demanding equal privileges. Just envision a dog saying, “I wonder what a human would look like in a leash?”, and the next thing that follows is some morbid, gory tale. Regardless of our faith in our own species, we are clearly being deceived and mislead by their sad puppy eyes and buffoonery. Even if they are here just for a good time, they do not serve as a solution or reassurance to every problem we students have. Let’s say my bank account was empty, cuddling up with a pup isn’t going to magically result in a $100 deposit into my bank account. It may temporarily resolve some stress, but it wouldn’t get rid of my long-term anxiety. They don’t solve everything, or if anything at all, as far as I am concerned. They leave us with high hopes and expectations that are seldom met because life is rough and we need to look beyond cuddling with therapy dogs to sort out our life crises. Like I said – they are great to have around, but you can only have one deep fried Twinkie a day, any more than that is too damn extra.

Nazia Sazneen, Section Editor

One thought on “Who Let the (Therapy) Dogs Out?

  1. Cory Pye says

    Actually, SMU has a new pilot plan. Instead of therapy dogs, we are going to have therapy crocodiles. Unfortunately, we couldn’t find any of the students who signed up for the pilot, so we are unsure if it will go ahead or not.

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